I Had Bottom Teeth For A Hour (written 5/13/2009)

Yesterday I had a Dr.'s Appt. and for the 1st time in a long while I was excited about this visit. I went to try on my splint with teeth on it. It felt so, so good to have teeth in and a full face, even though it was short lived. I am happy at this stage in my treatment b/c it's getting close to my last surgery (my implants), which should be in 4 wks from now. I also received wonderful news, my Dr. told me that they will wire me some dentures in my mouth the same day of my implant surgery. That makes me really happy b/c at first i was told that i had to wait a couple of months for my implants to heal before i get teeth. Now I can get temporary teeth before my perm. implants, I am excited. Finally some good news, Iam trying not to get too happy b/c things always come up. I can't believe it, I will have teeth in 4 wks. GOD is Good, All the Time.
My Dr. also said they will release my front lip muscles so the sink in my lower lip will not be there. I will look as close to my old self as possible.
After a mth. and a couple of wks, I will be back at work and life will be back to normal . I am looking forward to that. I haven't worked steady since Aug. 2008. I cant wait for the day when I smile and talk and my lip don't twist or the day I have a full normal looking face. It's almost here, I am about to Take my Life Back with My Battle with AMELOBLASTOMA.

Still Waiting 4 Surgery (written 4/22/2009)

I am still waiting on a surgery date, still waiting 4 a call from my doctor. Why do this stuff take so long. I had a special x-ray that showed I have plenty of bone for my implants. So I just don't understand what the hold up is. I need this surgery done and over, like yesterday. I feel so bad complaining about my appearance, especially after I saw a woman who was shoted in the face by her boyfriend on a talk show one day. I remember thinking my outer appearance problems is so,so small compared to her one. I felt ashamed, selfish, ect. Then I tolded myself it's ok for me to want my old face back, and after everything I been though, I earned the right to compliant. I relied anyone with some kind of face deformities rather it's big or small will want to be normal again. I just need to cheer up becaused I already won half of the battle with Ameloblastoma. I will keep you informed. SANDRA

Half OF MY Face (written 3/20/2009)

This is how i take pictures theses days. i am so,so unhappy and upset. My Dr said I will not got my implant as schedule because my case is complicated. He will have 2 meet with LSU Dental and they will have 2 work together 2 get me implants and dentals. I am mad because 4 mths was long either 2 wait, now I have 2 wait GOD knows how long. I am depressed, I tried 2 stay positive thur out all of this, but now it is wearing me down. why don't this Dr. know this is my life, I been out of work sent Aug. 2008. I can't start a new job for a few weeks and go out on a leave for a surgery and expect someone 2 hold my job. It just don't work like that. I need 2 have this surgery, so i can recovery, then go 2 work. I hate talking 2 people and my mouth twist 2 one side, i hate it. I most of the time stay in the house and I am tire of that. I do not attent an parties, wedding, ect because of my face. I just want 2 be normal again, I want the old me back, I want 2 live again. LORD please help me because I am at a low place right now, I am so tire. I know, in a year this will all be behind me and I will read back on this and it will seem so long ago, but right now this is so real. I feel so along, but I know iam not, all I have to do is go to the support group website. I am just emotionally, physically, and mentally hurting today more than normal and don't get me wrong I have a big family, husband, and 2 beauiful children; but until this happens 2 you, you just don't know, you have no idea what we go thur with AMELOBLASTOMA. It's a nightmare!!!

I Went To LAS VEGAS (1/26/2009)

This is some pictures I took while I was in Vegas, I had to get away, my friend,Angel & I went.

Pictures after 2nd Surgery (written 1/13/2009)

This is how i look simce my 2nd surgery. Iam kind of depressed. I barely leave my house. I am presently not employed, yet my Dr. gave me the o.k. to go back to work. People stare at me in public, they even ask, " Girl what happen to you". I am so, so tired of telling my story about AMELOBLASTOMA. I just want this to go away. I want my life back. I just want my implants!!!! I just want this over!!!!! I know i have alot to be thankful for; my bone graft is a success, i am a nurse, i have a beauiful family and home, ect. Still i can't help feeling sad because at the end of the day, I look at me in the mirror everyday. Lord please forgive me from sounding so ungraceful. My dr. told me last week that i can't get implants until 4 mths from now. That makes me feel so sad. It takes alot out of me to go it public and talk to people with the big sink under my lip and my lips twist when i talk and smile. Today is just not a good day for me.

HELLO, IT'S ME!!!! (written 9/13/2008)

Hello, sorry I haven't been writing, I been wrapped up with Hurricane Gustuv. I had to evacuate to another state, and I have lots of damage to my home. I have a doctor's appt Monday (9/15/2008). I will try to get my next surgery date moved up as much as possible. I want this nightmare behind me. I just wanted to check it, I will post pictures next time.Stay tune, Sandra

More Photos

The 2 pictures with the yellow gown is taken 3 wks after surgery. The other 2 with me sitting on the sofa was taken today. I thought most of my swelling was gone until I went to the store today and I saw a friend who stated, " Oh Sandra, what happen to your face, it's so big". I felt so bad, b/c I really thought I looked o.k. I am so really to start my reconstruction surgery. My chin is always shiny looking, I am constantly drool without realizing it, esp. at night when Iam sleeping (It's better than when I first had surgery). Cold air directly on my face hurts and the numbness is so real, it's hard to get use of. Someone please tell me that this will pass and I will be normal again!!! I know, I should be grateful to GOD for everything, he got me thur this and I have talented doctors. I am so really to go to work, this is not like me, to sit at hm all day. My next appt. is Sept. 2, 2008, maybe I will get the o.k. to return to work. I have only 1 compliant, I have daily headaches since surgery. I will keep you updated. Sandra